Yesterday one of the participants left in the middle of a workshop I was conducting. It seems (only guessing) it was done as a protest against something I said. We had different opinions about a definition of an important to us concept. I saw it differently, she saw it differently.
Does it have to exclude our liking each other? Or simply respecting? Do we have to cling to that one (maybe the only one) thing that differs us? Why do we sometimes cross people off just because they see something differently? Do people have to agree completely with us so we can like, respect them and not leave the room with a rustle of our underskirts?
This situation stopped me and showed me that I stand by a few things. Not behind a thick brick wall, but still behind a nice wooden fence.
- In spite of a discomfort or a risk of not being understood or liked, I can’t, or rather I’m unwilling to bow and pretend to be politically correct in things that matter to me. I choose a discomfort over conformism. I don’t see it as a virtue, I am simply built that way.
- People don’t have to agree with me; I respect our differences, but I don’t change (or pretend to change) my opinion just because they want me to. Or (in case of the workshop participant who decided to leave) because “there is only one definition” of the concept. If it was so, we wouldn’t have had a discussion. And the discussion we had.
- I don’t sense in me a need to be right or to know the universal truth that is true for whenever, wherever and for whomever. The truth (in my understanding) is too complicated, complex, made of too many components, etheric, volatile, dependent upon, for us to comprehend it with our small, limited (yet still amazing) brains. Small brains and just six senses, counting intuition. I’m cultivation a distance to myself here.
- Our opinion depends upon a million factors – our experiences, choices, authorities, needs, personality, genes, Moon’s phase, the constellation of the stars when we were born. I appreciate the complexity and I don’t expect all of us to agree.
- Taking all the above into consideration I am choosing to pay attention not to go overboard – when stating my opinion and even making an argument for it not to feel any pressure to convince anyone 100%. To acknowledge their right to differ.
To the person who chose to leave my workshop I’m sending warm regards and appreciation for her passion. I understand that under yesterday’s stars maybe she couldn’t have acted differently. That’s how the Universe worked out. Namaste.