What do you (and I) need spirituality for? Isn’t it enough to just be, just live without going into things one can’t understand? Or things that maybe don’t even exist? Why would one want to wander through some inner feelings, intuitions, beliefs, fairytales?
Yes, without the spiritual dimension we can live safer. We don’t get into incomprehensible and illogical spheres. Nobody will make fun of us. We will be regarded as serious people.
But is it life’s primary goal to be a serious person? Definitely not mine. I want to tell you what I need spirituality for. How I experience it. Why I talk about it, Why I will not give it up.
I feel connected to the Universe, wrapped up softy by its Mystery. I’m well aware of the fact that a tiny brain given to my disposal in this version of my being will never penetrate it to get answers to all my “why’s”. But I sense Her wisdom and Her greatness. I know it runs through me. I am standing with my mouth wide open AMAZED by Her, by Her presence.
My best life happens when I “remember” about the Mystery. I’m not remembering Her with my mind (“Oh, I forgot about the Mystery! One always needs to remember!”). Rather it’s remembering from my gut, my body: “Oh, there You are, I feel You, I am in You, You are in me”.
That’s my version of spirituality. Dipping deeply in he Mystery, feeling Her, respecting Her, being led by Her.
How would `my life be without Her?
I would have to shut my eye tightly so I don’t the the Her.
Trust only in what I perceive with my five senses and my (oh, so small) mind. I would have to believe that it can explain everything. I would have to count on it to be the only source of solutions to problems. And of course the only source of joy and happiness.
I wouldn’t feel taken care of.
I would be lonely. Not connected with anything great. Just a dust in the wind.
I would feel unimportant. Maybe even worse than the “better ones”.
I would be afraid. Of death, but mostly of life. I would take the passage of time badly.
I would feel that everything rests on my shoulders. Overwhelmed by responsibility for myself and the whole world
I wouldn’t experience miracles. I wouldn’t be able to access really fascinating layers of myself and the world.
I wouldn’t be AMAZED.